On Being an Adult

I am an adult. At least legally. I'm 22 (three months from 23)so I've been an "adult" for a while now, yet I don't feel like I've quite gotten my sea legs. Let's take a look at all of the adult things I have:

1) A Job. A real life, 9 to 5 (well 7:45-5:15), full-time job. So monies are going into my bank account. Woot.

2) A lease. Yeah yeah, I have a studio apartment that I share with a cat. It's too expensive and I can't wait to get out. Whatever.

3) Insurance! Okay, so technically I don't have it yet, but I'll have it in less than a month. This includes dental!

4) 401k. This is the one that makes me feel most like an adult. I see pictures of a corpulent man behind a mahogany desk, a green lamp perched on top, telling me I need to save, save, save. Once again, I don't have it yet but I'll have it in about a month.

But I don't feel like an adult. I feel shaky, like I still have end dates. All my life I've had a point when something would end, mostly school followed by temp jobs. Now my future just stretches blankly before me. I've passed all the mountains, nothing but plains as far as the eye can see. It's like sliding off a cliff with nothing to hold onto.

I miss school. I know when I go back in a couple of years it won't be the same. Grad school is a whole new can of worms. A new adventure? I hope so. A new debt free adventure like my undergrad? My fingers are crossed. I guess grad school has an end date, but it also doesn't have a start date. It's ephemeral, intangible. I don't count it quite yet.

I like being an adult. I like that I can go have a beer after work. I like having a paycheck. I like buying my own groceries. There are so many great things that come as perks of being an adult that I can't wait until I'm better at it.