Math

I need to go to Grad school. It's no longer a want, it's a need. The thought bounces around brain in some form or another probably 80% of my day. I'm left chewing my bottom lip (my own personal form of nervous torture) and pulling my hair. I wouldn't be nearly so nervous if I didn't have such an ugly beast standing in my way. Math.

Math has always been my antagonist. This angry relationship began earlier with my dismissal of the times table. Do I really need to memorize 9X4 when I've got such a thing as a calculator? Well, funny you should ask, but I do. Turns out multiplication is the basis for everything and the mean standardized testing people consider use of a calculator "cheating".

So instead of my usual groaning and finger pointing, I'm going to grab math by the you-know-what's and tame it once and for all. I'm restarting the basics, memorizing that pesky times table. By July, I'll get the 500 I so desperately need and want on the quantitative section. I'll conquer that standardized piece of dream killing manure. It will bend beneath the power of my brain!

Honestly, I just feel stupid. I feel like I took 12+ years of math tutorial for granted. I've skimmed by on just enough and now it's not enough. This disability has the potential to ruin my life. I'm terrified of a stupid test. Well no more! Master's in History, here I come!